I've thought all along that this particular side effect would probably merit a post all of its own and in advance have been trying to think of titles for this post ............ The Shed ............ Hair Today - Gone Tomorrow ........... Brave the Shave (grossly overused already) ........... Hairdryer For Sale
Thursday/Day 14
Just before bed I absentmindedly ran my hands through my hair and looked down to find a dozen or so strands in my hand ............
Thursday/Day 14
Just before bed I absentmindedly ran my hands through my hair and looked down to find a dozen or so strands in my hand ............
............ yep the fallout has started 😭😭😭
Day 14 is for many when the hair starts to come out (although for some it hangs on until after the second infusion) so it'd been in my mind all week and I've been waiting for it - but surely auto suggestion can't apply to hair follicles!!
The top of my head felt quite sore to the touch, as though I've whacked it on something or like I haven’t washed my hair for weeks - you know, that tight, pulling feeling on the scalp.
I didn't sleep really that night, I kept imaging my hair falling out in great clumps and waking to find myself almost buried in hair - of course that didn't happen, there weren't even many on the pillow. So at the moment it's really just when I touch my head, they fall (I can hear Ian saying - well don't touch it!)
Of course it was only a matter of time as very few people on FEC escape it, but once again I'd pooh poohed it as unimportant (let's face it, I’m not known for my stylish hairdo 🧑🏼 - in fact many times over the years I've said I'd prefer to be bald - be careful what you wish for 😬😬😬) and I didn't realise how it would bring home to me what's happening - it's made me very sad.
Chemo drugs attack rapidly dividing cells (which is what cancers are) but unfortunately they can't differentiate between good cells and bad cells so they all get killed off and this includes hair follicles.
For years I've zealously avoided having my photo taken and now all of a sudden I really wish I had more pictures to look back at. Since January I've lost 1 1/2 stone and with my new short haircut I've actually been feeling OK about how I look ............ but now that's so temporary.
Just what is this blasted chemo going to do to my body? Will I bloat up with all the steriods and lack of exercise? Will I end up scrawny because I can't eat due to mouth sores and no taste buds? How will my hair eventually grow back (assuming it does as for 6% hairloss is permanent)? What about changes to my skin/teeth/nails? Will any side effects just be temporary or will I end up with long term problems like tinnitus or neuropathy. So many things COULD happen, I get very scared.
Now the hair loss has started, I think I really want it over and done with quickly so should I just shave my head and move on ............ or do I want to hang on for as long as possible.
Friday/Day 15
No change on the head front, just a few hairs coming away when I touch it.
Saturday/Day 16
We had a lovely day out with friends in the glorious Autumn sunshine and mostly I forgot about my hair, except for a little tug every now and then - don't know why I think it might suddenly manage to re-attach itself.
Sunday/Day 17
Ouch my head is really, really sore now - I could barely rub the shampoo on it this morning. .................. and it's coming out in large quantities
The time has come so a quick text to my lovely hairdresser and she's coming Monday morning.
Monday/Day 18
Once again Chloe made it so easy for me, she just got on with it. I've had a No.4 and it feels great, my scalp is less sore already. I could have gone shorter but this looks good and conceals the places where the hair has thinned more (probably where I've be pulling it out 😈😈😈😈😈)
Luckily I'm fairly proficient with Photoshop so teeth whitened and a few wrinkles removed 😆
Of course it'll continue to fall out but at 1/2" long will be much easier to deal with.
